Nothing is Free

A man and his wife took a long, leisurely drive out to the country and pulled over at a gas station to air up one of the tires. The wife was surprised to see that the station had a fee to fill the tires and said, “Why in the world do they charge for AIR?!”

The husband responded, “Inflation.”

Red light, green light

Two friends are in a car when they approached a red-light. Instead of stopping, the driver drove right through it.

The passenger yelled “Hey… you just ran that red light!”

“Don’t worry,” the driver said. “My brother does this all the time…”

So they continue along, come to another red-light, and the driver again just drove right through it.

“Didn’t you see that red-light you just went through?” asked the passenger.

“I told you, don’t worry about it! My brother does this all the time!” answered the driver.

So they’re going along, come to an intersection with a greenlight, and the driver slammed on the brakes. The passenger then yelled, “Why the heck are you stopping at a green-light?!”

The driver responded, “My brother might be coming the other way!”

Short Ones

What do you call a Ford Fiesta that ran out of gas? A Ford Siesta.

When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway.

Why did the traffic light never gossip? It knew when to stop!

What kind of cars do cooks drive? Chef-rolets.

Where do Volkswagens go when they get old? The Old Volks home.

What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.

What kind of snakes are often found on cars? Windshield vipers.

What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? Tyrannosaurus wrecks.